So let me tell you how Friday went. I asked the Hubs to come with me because I was nervous how I would react to bad news if we received it. We get there at 9:00 and my heart is racing, palms are sweating, anxiousness galore. I’m trying to be positive and believe that I’m pregnant. I mean, I had one symptom (sore abs??) so that is a good thing.
I thought, obviously, we would get the results at the office that morning. Nope. Melissa drew my blood and then said they would call us around 11 am. OMG. Emotional roller coaster. So the Hubs went to work and I went home, I took the day off, to chill out. I distracted myself by doing chores and reading a book. 11:00 am comes and goes and no call (except the Hubs).
At noon (finally!!) Melissa calls and I can just tell by her tone of voice she had good news. She said beautiful words to me, “congrats Lindsey you’re pregnant”!! I was beside myself. Very very very happy. Melissa also said not only was it a positive but I had a quite high beta number – 556. What that means, is the amount of HCG (pregnancy hormone) in my blood. The importance of that is, if the number is low (less than 25) it could be a chemical pregnancy. No chance in that with a number as high as 556! Additionally, a more “normal” number is around 100….I had 5X that! Such positive news!
As soon as I hung up I burst into tears, got down on my knees, thanked God and then called the Hubs. He was elated. He was at lunch with a coworker and after I shared the news there wasn’t much more to be said at that point. After we hung up, he continued to text me periodically throughout the day… “I’m so excited”, “I didn’t think it was ever going to happen”, “I love you so much”, “I cannot believe how happy I am”. When he finally made it home, he had brought me three bunches of flowers (I like the make the arrangements myself) a giant hug, and a huge smile. Although I always wanted to “announce it to the Hubs in a special way (positive pregnancy test as a gift, little baby socks, etc.) due to our journey, this was equally great. It was a really fantastic day, I love you baby.
The Hubs and I disagree on announcing this to family yet. I would really really like to wait at least until the end of March, which would put me at 8 weeks. Still not out of the “danger zone” but much better. The Hubs doesn’t understand my fear of having a miscarriage and then having to discuss it with other people. He doesn’t understand how hard it would be for me. He says, “just tell people you don’t want to talk about it”. Well I have to talk about it as soon as they ask how the pregnancy is going and, God forbid, it’s not, ya know? So we’ve agreed (him reluctantly) to wait and tell everyone at Easter.
Today, I went for my second blood draw and they are wanting to see the number more than double. I will get a call around noon with the results and also to schedule my next appointment, which would be my first ultrasound to look at the little Nugget. If everything goes well, I’ll be released from IVFmd to my Ob-GYN and hopefully have a normal, wonderful pregnancy.
How do I feel? Emotional-wise I’m: amazed, blessed, nervous, super happy, anxious, ecstatic all rolled into one. Physically, I just have the sore abs and a bit of cramping. That’s it. No nausea or anything (woohoo) but I should probably wait to see what is to come before I celebrate. A fellow IVFer that had her baby last year said, be cautiously optimistic – I feel like that’s appropriate.
This journey of life is about to make a HUGE change and we are more than excited!